Two Birds, One Stone

Last Friday night I went to see The Shins and Belle & Sebastian at the Hollywood Bowl with Rebecca and her friend Emily. (Is that a record for most links in one sentence? If so, is there a prize for that? If so, where do I collect said prize?) The bowl is always an excellent time. Rebex and I found great parking and got there in plenty of time to see the Shins, even though we were terrified that we wouldn’t make it all the way from work on time. We had wine and delicious picnic food, including various cheeses, the most delicious strawberries in the universe, and chocolate bundt cakes, which I stubbornly insisted on calling butt cakes.

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Despite the good music and great company, as the night wore on I found myself getting fidgety. The show went from 7:30 to 11, and everyone was staying seated. Well, I had been sitting down for over 12 hours already that day, counting the commute to and from work. I needed to move around, dudes! And suddenly the best idea ever appeared like a light bulb over my head. I thought, I’d be so happy right now if I was on an exercise bike or an elliptical cycle. I could be enjoying the live music while getting a workout! So I determined that the best concert hall ever would consist of a normal stage and layout, but instead of seats it would have cardio machines, circuit training machines, weights, and mats for stretching. Now, you might say “But what about just standing up and dancing to the music?” Well, I agree that dancing is often a good solution for fidgetyness, but along with that comes people banging into you, spilling drinks on you, jumping in front of you and blocking your view, and the general ruining of fun. If we each had our own exercise equipment, we could all maintain our own personal space! And we could spin, run, or lift to the music! We would all be healthy and have hot bodies, and also be well-rounded individuals, due to all the concerts we were taking in. By George, I didn’t become a certified genius for nothing!

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