BaddMinton

Last night I went out with some new friends from my improv class. We went to a bar in Hollywood called the Pig & Whistle, and the theme of the evening was “Frat Night.” I guess we were supposed to feel like we were at a frat party, but the only thing even remotely fratty was the fact that they kept giving us free jello shots. Otherwise, we all agreed it was unlike and more fun than any frat party we’d ever been to in college. The DJ didn’t even play a single Dave Matthews song.

Well… after we’d each had a drink and a couple jello shots, the buzz kicked in and three of us found ourselves heatedly discussing which one of us was whiter: my friend Virginia or me. We were both adament about not being declared the whitest of the bunch, which is totally retarded now that I think of it, because, well… all three of us are… white. I initially thought I would be the whitest, and Virginia decided that since she was half Catholic that made her less white. But I said republicans are whiter than democrats, and her parents are both avid republicans, whereas my dad is a democrat and my mom doesn’t seem to really give a wet rat’s ass about politics. Then I threw in that my mom, though white herself, grew up in a third-world Latin American country and speaks fluent Spanish, and I scored some major non-white points with that. Then our friend Josh told us each to say “For Shizzle,” and I won that one, too, even though Virginia added “my nizzle.” She did get some points for that, but not enough, and she was deemed the whitest — at least for the evening. Then we started dancing, but we forbade Josh to analyze our dancing skills in relation to our whiteness, because you can’t dance when someone is analyzing you.

Now that we’ve cleared that up, you may be wondering why you should be thanking me. Really this only applies to you if you live in L.A., so sorry to those of you that are like, “Yaaawwwwnnn, Marcy, this blentry is soooooo boring, give me a break, for crying out loud, I don’t live in L.A. and I don’t caaaare about the parking there.” BUT. Those of you who do, I took one for the team last night. I keep asking everyone about parking in loading zones at night, and everyone goes, “I know the yellow ones are fine after six, but I’m not sure about the white ones.” Nobody knew! Now, I’ve parked in the white ones before and not gotten a ticket, so I thought maybe they were all cool at night. Not so. Yellows only. It’s $35 if you park in a white for more than five minutes (yes, I’m talking about “whites” again). So don’t do it. See? You’re welcome.

Three Whities: Me, Virginia, Erin

Happy Weekend! I’m going to Disneyland tomorrow! Yaaaaaaaay!