Panic Atax

My friend Annie just called to see what I was doing. “My taxes,” I said. “Well, I mean, not yet… I’m actually looking for my W-2, and, you know, paying some bills and stuff.”

“Aaaah, why do we do this?!” she moaned. She hasn’t done her taxes either, and for those of you who are already on a beach in Mexico spending your refund, today is the day before taxes are due, and some of us are running out of time. Once again, I haven’t even started, and once again, instead of starting, I am composing a blentry about why I haven’t started. In 2.5 hours I have to be dressed and on my way to my friend’s wedding in Malibu. Currently I am sitting in my house (in the “nook,” for those of you who are familiar with my living quarters), laptop on my lap and papers strewn about on the floor, wearing sweatpants and the Nativity scene hoodie I made for Rebex’s most recent Hideous Christmas party (The star and the Baby Jesus are sparkly)! Oh, and I’m also mildly hungover and still have on the makeup I wore last night. Young acheiver, this one. A real go-getter. Watch out, y’all, I might accidentally take over the world while you’re not looking.

Annie had gotten off work early and was thinking of doing something fun and spontaneous like driving out of town. After I reminded her about taxes being due, she surmised that “not doing taxes” was most likely the unconscious motivation for her sudden desire to go out and live. Hey, a lot can get done while in the throes of procrastination. For example, how long has it been since I’ve posted a blentry? And here I am, just typing away while the seconds tick by. I also went through stacks of old mail and paid a bunch of bills that have been sitting around. I figure, you need something like taxes every now and then to get you to do anything and everything else. It’s like a pyramid of procrastination. Like, in order for me to do things I usually put off, I need something more annoying that I want to do even less. So much less that the original annoyance that I’ve been putting off for days, weeks, months or years suddenly seems like a GREAT IDEA! A very urgent thing I must do, RIGHT NOW! A fun adventure indeed.

Now if you’ll excuse me, time keeps marching on and my taxes aren’t going to do themselves. In other words, I’d better go get those dust bunnies out from under my bed. Allergies, people! What is more important than my health???

3 Responses to Panic Atax

  1. Annie says:

    Well since you outed me as a procrastinator, I must let you in on my little secret, taxes aren’t due until the 17th! Ha ha ha. Just went to the IRS website!

  2. Rachel says:

    I know that this may only enhance your procrastination, but did you know that taxes aren’t due until Tuesday? It’s because of some obscure holiday in Washington, D.C. (they have like 400 holidays, you know).

  3. marcyminton says:

    Yeah, I realized that yesterday, and it’s lucky, because in my haste on Sunday I had accidentally chosen some weird “deluxe” expensive version of Turbo Tax, so I had to start all over last night. Doh!

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *