June 4th, 2007
This Is Where I Am
My back and neck are so painfully tight, and I have such an unrelenting tension headache, that if a bum walked up to me with visible scabies and offered me a massage, I would take it.
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June 4th, 2007 at 6:27 pm
Bonus if the bum has really callousy palms and fingers, to help exfoliate your skin.
June 5th, 2007 at 10:08 am
Lucky for you I am a connoisseur of scabie-covered-bumrubs!
Ok, now, if you’re looking for a full body treatment, with release, then I must recommend the troubled soul who wallows on the corner of Willshire and Cresent Heights. Scabies? Check! Sure, he’s missing a few digits but they are truly the fingerless hands of an Angel! Another alternative would be the vagabond who roams the alleyways on Fairfax between Beverly and Oakwood. She smells like pee and suffers from Tourette’s but if you can get past the cussin’ she’ll roll your back out with an old shopping cart wheel and leave you feelin’ shiny and new!
June 6th, 2007 at 9:32 am
lady - don’t you have a gift certificate from me for a massage that I gave you for your b’day?? I am dying from strep right now but should be good in a few days so let me know when! And I have no visible skin diseases - bonus! xx
June 13th, 2007 at 8:11 pm
I never did figure out why you were so sore. Now I am wondering where you at? I am sure LA is a treasure trove of summer fun. Holla!