BaddMinton

My roommate Matthew is moving out, and we’re supposed to find a new roommate to replace him (not that anyone could replace you, Matthew) (not that you read my blog anyway) by July 1. And we have not. Mind you, we have interviewed several people and have offered the room to four of them, and all four have turned it down for various and sundry reasons. This leaves me befuddled, because we have never had this kind of problem in the past. Usually people are begging to move into our adorable house. This time it has been like pulling teeth, though, and as the clock ticks by, offers we would never have considered in the past are now starting to seem more and more attractive. You have a dog? Sure! A snake? Well… come over and we’ll meet you. A snake that roams free in the house and likes to cuddle on the couch and watch TV? Uh… I mean, I’ll try anything once…

The best of these, though, is the twins. Please enjoy their email and photo below (ALL IN CAPS! THEY ARE TWINS AND MUST SHOUT AT ALL TIMES!):

HI MY NAME IS J***. MY TWIN BROTHER J**** AND I ARE LOOKING FOR A ROOM THAT WE CAN SHARE. YOUR PLACE SOUNDS GREAT SO I THOUGHT I’D ASK IF THE TWO OF US COULD SHARE THE ROOM.

WE ARE BOTH 21. WE GO TO SCHOOL,WORK, WRITE AND WORKOUT. WE DON’T DRINK OR SMOKE. WE ARE VERY SOCIAL,OUTGING AND VERY CHILL GUYS. HOPEFULLY WE CAN HAVE THE CHANCE TO GET THIS PLACE. PLEASE CONTACT US IF YOU CAN, I’D LOVE TO TELL YOU MORE ABOUT US.

TWINCERLY, J*** L******

No, your eyes are not deceiving you. He signed the email “Twincerely.” Could this possibly get any better?