Nuclear Summer

Y’all, I am fa-REAKING out about nuclear energy. I know this sounds weird, but I am. I don’t want it. And lots of powerful people are calling for government funding to go toward developing nuclear energy in the US. WTF?? This scares the ever-loving s@%t out of me, and would you think I was crazy if I told you that all the way to work this morning, I was in a state of near panic thinking about it?

So from what I understand, this oil spill in the gulf of Mexico has lots of people finally realizing that we need to get off oil as an energy source. And that’s great news, because we really, really do need to get off that shit for so many reasons, including, oh, I don’t know, war, and the destruction of our whole planet, and at first I was like, “Well, this oil spill really sucks the big one, but at LEAST it will get people’s attention and we can finally, seriously start developing alternative energy sources.” But then I realized, Hey, I bet now people are going to want to go nuclear even more, and that SCARES THE SHIT OUT OF ME! Last night I was feeling scared about it, so I brought it up to my boyfriend (I have one, Blog! I haven’t told you yet, but I do!). My boyfriend is not only cute, funny, smart and sweet, but he also works in environmental policy, as though he had read the handbook on how to woo me. So he knows all about this stuff, and I was really hoping he’d tell me that nuclear energy will never happen here, but he didn’t, and instead, he told me some stuff that made me even scareder (although I assure you this was not his intention, because he is sweet, as I mentioned earlier).

Things that I find spooky about nuclear energy include:
1. Things can go wrong, and we might blow up the world.
2. The more nuclear plants and nuclear waste-storage facilities we have, the more targets we have for terrorists (eeeek, terrrror!)
3. Speaking of nuclear waste, do you want it near your house? I don’t. It never breaks down. Ever. And it will kill you.

Why do we think creating this stuff is a better solution than what we’ve got? Maybe it works temporarily because it doesn’t release greenhouse gases, but I’m telling you people, down the road, we’re going to regret the shit out of this decision. If I had my druthers, we’d power everything with wind and solar power, and we’d all travel by train. With the billions it would take to build one single nuclear plant, we could build a giant, slightly creepy-yet-adorable army of windmills! And I’ll be the first to tell you that solar power is awesome, because my last apartment building had hot water that was solar powered, and I’ve never seen water that heated up that fast or stayed hot that long. Every time I showered, I felt like I was at a swanky hotel (except for the peeling paint on the window frame and the cat scratching on the door to get in). The fact that Southern California isn’t completely powered by the perpetual sunshine that we have blows my mind to smithereens.

So what do we do? Write letters? Start a Facebook campaign? Does anyone get the shivers like I do when you think about this?

If I haven’t convinced you yet, think about this: If we get more nuclear power, we’ll have to endure years and years of people who should know better pronouncing it “nucular.” If that’s not ghoulish enough to make your teeth chatter, you must be a robot.

One Response to Nuclear Summer

  1. Keith D says:

    I know this isn’t supposed to be all serious, but I hope you’re not actually panicking about this. Nuclear energy is very safe. As far as I know, there has only been one nuclear plant explosion in history–Chernobyl, which was a poorly constructed plant. Even 3 Mile Island wasn’t as bad as it seemed. No fatalities or injuries. France gets 75% of their power from nuclear, and they love it.

    Unfortunately, right now using solar or wind just wouldn’t work. Neither generate enough electricity. Plus it’s really hard to store electricity, which would be needed at night for solar, and at times when there is no wind for the wind farms. As for your hot water, that’s a system that actually heats the water in the sun, then stores it in a tank. No electricity generated at all. Definitely saves energy, but can’t be used for other things.

    I live about 4 miles from a nuclear plant, and I don’t worry about it at all. In fact, I wish they would hurry up and build another reactor next to it, like they have planned :)

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